It doesnt matter what I am

Its so easy to see me as a cute and innocent girl
but you dont know me on the inside
its so easy to wanna control me
to say that I am weak
but you dont know how strong I am
its so easy to say that Im pathetic
that every story I tell is for attention
but you dont even know how I feel
its so easy to say that Im useless
that I stand for nothing
but you dont even know what I can do
maybe Im not that cute, innocent, weak, pathetic and useless !
and it doesnt even matter what I am
cause I would still do everything for the ones I love

special for u dear..my perfect guy

Slowly drifting away into your everlasting eyes.
Looking into emerald diamonds that shine so bright.
Your long black eyelashes raise to the blue skies.
The color of love glazes my way into the dark night.

Skin so soft caress my body into an ecstasy.
Silky as satin brushes across my bare face.
Breathtaking as your touch thats like a fantasy.
It comforts me when I feel out of place.

Lips sweet as candy that long to always satisfy.
A bittersweet sugar rush races through my veins.
Tongue tied words that soar my wings to fly.
A soft touch lessens away all my pain.

If only I could describe everything about you.
I'd go on forever because it could never die.
All I know is that I have a love that is true.
Everything about you makes you the perfect guy.

i love u dear:)

syg sgt2 kt u tp i xleh jmpa u smlm..sory sgt2 dear.n ni 1st tie i tolak ajakan u nk jmpa kn..ssh sgt nk gtau i xbleh jmpa u smlm tp nk bwt cmne kn i trpksa buat mcm tu..watever it is i still love u sama aja..hope i dpt jmpa u lain kli..i do miss u so much..take cre tau..

why its so hard(

npe rs sgt ssh nk lupakan dia..few days he never contact me anymore..tp mmg aku sndri pn brhrp dia x cntact aku lg.i tgk post dia kt wall mnta frens give back their fon no tp aku diamkn je.bai je la.klu btl he need my no i prefer he ask me directly..mybe ni jgk cara yg trbaik utk terus lost cntact n lupkan dia..he seems no need me anymore..mybe btl dia x perluakn aku lg dlm hidup dia skg ni..aku elakkn dri aku dri on9 n tgk page dia sbb aku xnk manangis lgi..dh 2 ari aku x nangis even ble pk psl dia.ni pn dh clup baik..tp still he is in my mind.mmg ssh nk lupakn seseprg yg dh jdi part of my life...xkn ada sorg pn yg boleh faham n rasa itu semua..saat aku bersama dgn dia mmg ssh aku nk luapak semau tubkn skjap tp almost three years..now dh msuk thn baru but xde mmber apa2 mkna pn bg aku..klu dia jgk mmg berniat nk ignore aku forever seems like aku kne tlg dia lupakn aku dgn cra mcm ni..x cntack x text or x berhubung lngsung..its hurt so much actually but  what can i do..sbg seorg prmpaun sdh lumrah kn segalanya di tgn lelaki :(tp syg i xleh tipu diri i sndri till now i still need u in my life,my love just only for u..n i hope stiap penantian i akn ada endingnya cz i love u so much..kt cni je i bleh lauhkn semua perasaan i pd u:(

loneliness makes me sorrow..

rs sakit sgt dlm perut ni bgn pg td..xtau nape nk kata period smpi skg aku x period2 lgi.tp mmg skt mcm aku prnh rs few days ago tp npe ye nk jmp doc aku tkt nk check tkt anything happen to me plus aku mne pernh g jmp doc sorg2 except for normal check up je..dri smlm aku nk blogging bru skg dpt..server slow sgt dri mlm td klu dpt sig in pn loading lmbt sgt2 smp aku fed up pdhal smlm mmg i need sumthing or sumone to share my feelings..nsb baik ada anis..aku text dia share my feelings to her tp x smunya..certain thing i must keep it secret cz aku dh jnji pd dri aku n dia jgk..anything bout us mmg aku xnk org tau sgt2 lbh2 lg xde ape yg perlu aku share..lgpn since knl almost 3years ni mmg aku x prnh share ngn org pn sjuah mne hbgn aku ngn dia cz its complicatd..dlu pnh share ckt ngn k.ayu tu pn sb kanti dia nmpk aku nangis time bln puasa tu yup sbb insiden tu aku ngn dia lama x cntact aku tau dia mrh sgt kt aku time tu hlg kprcyaan pd aku tp scra jujurnya aku rs bodoh sgt2 time tu aku slp menilai kwn aku sndri at last hbgn aku ngn dia dingin..smlm aku teruk nangis pk psl dia..bgn pgi ni terus demam pns..biasala tu kn slalu jdi cmtu ble aku agk tertekan lbh2 lg aku sorg2 je kt umh ni..sok mybe almas blik xde la aku rs sunyi sgt2 mcm xde org amik tahu lngsung psl aku..tiap klu bgn td aku hrp sgt adi msj dri dia tp:(..mmg aku dh biasa alami keadaan yg mcm ni..mybe anis btl aku kne kuat..dia percya kau kuat sbb dia sdnri pnh tgk aku dlu time break off ngn zalmi..aku sndri pn xtau sjuah mna kau kut tp yg alu tahu ble melibatkn org2 yg aku syg mmg aku mudah jatuh mudah nangis..tu mmg aku ngaku tmbh plak aku mmg jns yg over senstif.tp aku tau nk x nk aku kne kuatkn diri ni jgk.;(